The Man Behind This Mess

You probably noticed I didn’t post anything this past Thursday.

I had a pretty good reason.

It was our 32nd wedding anniversary.

So I figured it was probably time I gave credit where credit is due and introduced you to the man behind this mess.

And by mess, I mean me.

This man deserves some kind of award for putting up with my shenanigans for nearly 38 years. Although, in my defense, we dated for almost six years before getting married, so he had plenty of time to reconsider.

He knew what he was getting into.

At least that’s what I tell him.

I know he cringes every time he hears me say one of two things:

“So, I was thinking…”

or

“I had an idea.”

First comes the deep breath.

Then the pause while he mentally prepares himself for whatever is about to come out of my mouth.

The silence is deafening.

Then comes the sigh.

And somehow, every single time, he takes it like a champ.

It doesn’t matter how big or small the idea or project might be.

For the record, I don’t really do small.

He may have questions. Lots of questions. But he rarely tells me no.

Unless it involves getting a cow.

Or another dog.

Or asking him to help me sew.

I guess everyone has their limits.

However…

I did get the okay for an otter.

So, if you happen to know where I can get one, I’m interested.

My Favorite “Yes” Man

Other women are constantly reminding me how fortunate I am to have a husband who is basically a “yes” man.

I’m still undecided whether that’s a blessing or a curse.

He is usually the one standing beside me while I convince myself that whatever crazy thing I’ve dreamed up is completely reasonable.

And sometimes he even joins in.

We joke that our romantic date nights often consist of walking hand in hand through the aisles of thrift stores.

Some couples do candlelit dinners.

We dig through other people’s discarded stuff looking for treasures.

Romance comes in many forms.

This past weekend, for example, he took me to a flea market and patiently helped me dig through vintage sewing patterns.

He carried my bag.

Then he took me to a sewing store, where he once again helped me look through trim, eyelet, fabric, and all the other things I absolutely did not need but somehow needed.

And because apparently that wasn’t enough excitement for one day, we wandered through not one, but two thrift stores.

And wouldn’t you know it?

He found the best treasures of the day at both of them.

I have to say, the man has developed quite the eye lately.

What man does that?

Of course, I’m sure I’ll eventually pay for all those romantic gestures with a couple of bottles of bourbon.

There’s always a price.

Nearly 38 Years of Us

Joking aside, this man has been part of my life since I was 15 years old.

Just stop and think about that for a minute.

Fifteen.

He has known almost every version of me.

He’s seen me at my best and at my worst, and all the messy versions somewhere in between.

He’s watched me grow up.

I’ve watched him grow up.

And somehow, through all the changes, we kept growing together.

He is my biggest cheerleader and my best friend.

He knows what I need, when I need it, and more often than not, how I’m feeling without a single word being spoken.

He challenges me when I need to be challenged.

He believes in me when I can’t seem to find that same confidence in myself.

When I’m scared, he pushes me forward, but I also know he’ll be standing right there if I fall.

He has taken care of me when I’ve been sick.

He has wiped my tears when I’ve cried.

He has made me laugh until I’ve peed my pants. Let’s be honest, at 53 and after three kids, it really doesn’t take much.

And he has listened to more of my “ideas” than any human being should reasonably be expected to endure.

My Favorite Adventure Partner

One of my favorite things about this stage of our life is getting to experience it together in a completely different way.

I love traveling with him.

I love exploring new places together and seeing the world from a whole new perspective.

And although it can be a lot sometimes, I even love the childlike excitement he gets when we’re about to go hiking.

You’d think the man had just been told he was going to Disney World.

Meanwhile, I’m standing there wondering exactly how far uphill this little adventure is going to involve.

But I go.

Because he makes me braver.

He gets me outside my comfort zone. He reminds me that I can do things I’m convinced I can’t. And somehow, knowing he’s beside me makes the scary things feel a little less scary.

That’s what having your person does.

How Did I Get So Lucky?

I think about this more often than I probably say out loud.

How did I get so lucky?

Some people spend their entire lives searching for their person.

Some never find them.

And somehow, I met mine when I was 15 years old.

What did I do to deserve that kind of gift so early in life?

I don’t have an answer.

I just know that somehow, at a time when we both needed each other, something brought us together.

And through nearly 38 years of growing, changing, struggling, laughing, raising a family, building a life, and figuring out who we are along the way, we’re still here.

Together.

There are a lot of things I hope for in this next chapter of my life. Places I want to see. Things I want to try. Adventures I want to have.

And probably several hundred more times I’ll walk into a room and say…

“So, I was thinking…”

And he’ll take that deep breath.

There will be the pause.

The sigh.

And then, more often than not, he’ll say yes.

I’ve always said I would rather be dirt poor with him than rich with anyone else.

After 32 years of marriage and nearly 38 years together, I still mean it.

I couldn’t ask for a better partner for this crazy roller coaster of a life.

Happy anniversary to my best friend, my biggest cheerleader, my adventure partner, my thrift-store treasure hunter, and the man behind this mess.

I love you.

And just so you know…

I’m still looking for that otter.