Today’s the day: Terrified, Excited, and Launching Anyway

There’s something mildly unhinged about announcing a launch date publicly before you feel emotionally prepared for it.

Ask me how I know. I am freaking the sh*t out!

Two nights ago I posted the sneak peek for the First Bloom Collection from Daisies and Defiance, and for approximately 12 seconds I felt excited and proud and brave and like one of those women who “just goes for it.”

Then immediately after hitting post, I wanted to throw my phone into another dimension and pretend none of this was happening.

Because suddenly it became real.

Not “someday.”
Not “I’m working on something.”
Not “maybe eventually.”

Real.

This evening at 7 PM, my shop officially launches.

And honestly? I’m terrified.

Not the cute, inspirational kind of terrified people put on motivational Pinterest quotes either. I mean full-blown, overthinking-everything, questioning-my-life-choices kind of terrified. We’re talking bubble gut level anxiety.

What if nobody buys anything?

What if people think it’s overpriced?

What if they think my work looks sloppy?

What if people look at it and think, “Oh… another girl making ruffle collar shirts.”

Because yes, there are several people creating beautiful reworked shirts right now, and I’m cheering them on as well. The trend exists. I’m not pretending I invented it.

But this?

This means so much more to me than a trend.

And I think that’s the part I’ve been struggling to explain.

These pieces aren’t just clothes to me. They’re stories.

Maybe that sounds dramatic, but if you’ve been here for any length of time, you already know I can be dramatic, especially when I get in my head. So let’s just embrace it.

The truth is, Daisies and Defiance was never born from wanting to sell something trendy. It came from wanting to create something meaningful. Something with soul. Something that felt like becoming.

Women who have been through things.
Women who have changed.
Women who have carried heartbreak and healing and motherhood and grief and survival and reinvention all in the same body.

Women who don’t look exactly like they did twenty years ago.
Women who don’t think like they did twenty years ago.
Women who have unraveled and rebuilt themselves more than once.

Which is also why imposter syndrome is currently beating me over the head with a folding chair.

Fun times over here.

I keep thinking:
Who am I to do this?
Who do I think I am creating a brand at this stage in life?
What if people laugh?
What if nobody understands it the way I do?

And if I’m being completely honest, I think part of what makes this scary is that this isn’t just me putting products online.

It’s me allowing myself to be seen.

That’s the terrifying part.

Because when you create something from your heart instead of just for profit, rejection suddenly feels very personal.

If nobody likes it, it feels like nobody likes YOU.

I know logically that’s not true, but tell that to my nervous system at 2 AM.

The funny thing is, this entire blog has always been about doing scary things.

Stepping outside the comfort zone.
Creating a life that feels authentic.
Choosing growth even when it feels wildly uncomfortable.

Apparently I love giving advice to myself that I later have to painfully follow.

Rude.

But here’s what I’m realizing:
Maybe courage isn’t confidence.

Maybe courage is announcing the launch anyway.

Maybe courage is posting the sneak peek while your hands shake.

Maybe courage is knowing people might judge you and deciding your dream matters more than their opinion.

Maybe courage is understanding that not everyone will “get it”, and doing it anyway.

Because the truth is, I don’t want Daisies and Defiance to be perfect.

I want it to feel human.

I want women to put these pieces on and feel something.

I want them to feel soft and strong at the same time.

I want them to feel like becoming.

I want them to feel like they don’t have to disappear just because they’ve been through hard things.

I want them to feel beautiful in the version of themselves they are now, not the version they used to be.

Especially women my age.

Because somewhere along the line, so many women start shrinking themselves.
Playing smaller.
Becoming quieter.
Dressing only to hide.

And maybe this sounds ridiculous over a shirt, but I don’t think women were made to disappear.

I think we were made to evolve.

And honestly? So were these shirts.

That’s the magic of reworking something.

You aren’t throwing it away because it’s imperfect or worn or different than it used to be.

You’re honoring what it’s been while giving it space to become something else.

That hits me right in the chest every single time.

Because I think a lot of us are walking around believing we missed our chance.

Too old.
Too late.
Too broken.
Too inexperienced.
Too much.
Not enough.

Meanwhile, life is sitting there saying:
“What if you’re not finished becoming yet?”

Whew.
Apparently I needed this pep talk too.

Listen, I have no idea what tonight is going to look like.

Maybe everything sells.
Maybe nothing sells.
Maybe five people buy something and my overly supportive husband refreshes the website 72 times pretending to be traffic support.

Who knows.

But I do know this:

I’m proud of myself for making it this far.

I’m proud that I stopped talking myself out of every idea before it had a chance to exist.

I’m proud that I created something instead of just dreaming about it.

And maybe most importantly, I’m proud that I’m showing up scared instead of hiding.

Because trust me… hiding sounded WAY more comfortable.

But comfort has never really changed anybody’s life.

So today this post goes live.

This evening at 7 PM CST, the Daisies and Defiance brand officially launches into the world.

So here’s to the women rebuilding themselves.
The women becoming softer without becoming weaker.
The women learning they can evolve without erasing who they used to be.

And here’s to the shirts that reminded me of that in the first place.

Still her. Always.